So, often I write long posts about various things I'm thinking about, but in case you are interested in what has been going on in mine and Cooper's lives (with a focus on mine, since this is my blog), then this is the post for you!
Married life is definitely good. I've felt a lot more calm and stable since getting married, and I love the man God provided me with. He's exactly what I need. He's romantic, thoughtful, helpful, and is better than anyone at cheering me up, which is good, because I can have mopey tendencies. We're coming up on eight months of marriage in a couple of weeks, and time has flown. I can't believe we'll be celebrating a year of marriage in just a few short months! We don't have any grand plans for our first anniversary yet; summer plans have yet to solidify and we don't know what kind of financial situation we'll be in, but hopefully we'll do something special for the day.
Cooper and I have been living in a cute one-bedroom apartment in a nice, quiet complex on the west side of town. It's close to a lot grocery stores and to our workplaces, so it's a convenient location, definitely a good change from our middle-of-nowhere location for our first three months of marriage (even though that arrangement was a huge blessing at the time!). I like the one-bedroom set-up, and don't have any strong desire for a bigger place, even though we've had to be creative with storage and careful with the amount of "stuff" we have. Which is just as well, considering we shouldn't be spending our small budget on lots of "stuff" anyway!
Cooper is still working for the school district's after-school program part time, and spending a lot of his free time searching for a paid internship so he can finish up his degree. They are hard to come by, but he's had a few optimistic leads within the last couple of weeks, so keep praying!
Since October, I've been working on the university campus as a receptionist at the freshman advising office. It's the perfect sort of job for me right now, and I really enjoy it. In fact, I think it's the first job I've ever had that I haven't dreaded going to, which is saying something! The work I do is fairly straight-forward; lots of phone calls, handling questions and concerns, scheduling appointments, and helping out the advisors with various office duties (filing, copying, making graphs and PowerPoints, reporting and maintaining databases). The people I work with are also really nice and my supervisor is a Christian, which is awesome, especially at a ridiculous uber-liberal university. I also get paid a salary and have health insurance, which is a nice cushion of comfort for sure.
The only thing I find frustrating with my job is some of the students and parents we deal with. At least once a week, I feel like we need a sign that says "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency an our part." I'm also frustrated with how rude people can be, and wondering if any parents ever teach their kids manners anymore. Also, I think since people pay so much money for school, there is an idea that you are purchasing a degree, rather than getting educated to earn one. So we get a lot of people asking us to break the rules for them, even if they didn't do well in their classes. I don't like the entitlement mentality, I guess.
But otherwise, this job is great. And depending on how long I stay here, there is the potential to move up to an advisor position, which I think would be something I'd really enjoy. It would be a way to work in education without having to lesson plan and worry about teaching. It's one of those careers I never really thought about before.
Cooper and I continue to be involved at our church. I've started teaching children's church, which so far is fun, and Cooper is doing a lot with College Group. Most of our friends are still all at the same church, and some of our family as well, which makes the community really good and encouraging. That's the one thing that would really make me hate to leave this town. As a city, I honestly could take it or leave it. It's too anti-Christian for my liking, and the cold winter weather really gets to me. I do love the outdoor opportunities, but I feel like we could find that elsewhere. But the friends and family we have here would be very hard to leave for both of us, I think. And our church, which is a little oasis.
We had the pleasure of welcoming our very first niece a month ago, Kale'a Amariah. She is adorable and I am very excited to spoil her as every auntie should. Even Cooper is warming up to her, and he didn't freak out too much when she spit up on him last weekend. Progress! :-)
Plans for the rest of the spring for us include working, internship-searching, and lots of praying as we seek God's direction for our lives. My best friend is getting married in just over a month, so it has been really fun helping her with wedding planning and all the fun things a maid-of-honor (I am one of two in her party) gets to do (I know, I know, technically I'm a matron-of-honor but I just hate the way that sounds). We hope to make a short trip back to California in March, and I'm already dreaming of warm weather!
All in all, I've really enjoyed this whole being out of school thing. No classes to worry about, no tests, no papers, no homework, and all the reading I do is all the reading I want to do. I love my free time when I get off work in the evenings and not constantly worrying about one or more upcoming due dates. It's so freeing! I've been asked by multiple people if I'm interested in pursing a PhD. And just so you all know, the answer is NO. Not remotely. If I go back to school, it will be to some sort of Christian university and I'll either just take classes for the shear joy of learning more about Jesus or to get some sort of bachelors in Biblical study or missions or some other such thing. But I have no desire to pursue any more learning at a secular university. Haha, watch, I say that, and then God will have far different plans for me. But if I have anything to say about it (and of course, ultimately I don't), then that is my plan. But I'd also be content never returning to school again, especially if we have kids in the next 5 years or so (?). I'd be much happier being a mommy a wife and focusing on that, doing the whole June Cleaver thing (take THAT feminism!).
As far as the ways God has been working in me personally, here are some things that I'm often thinking and praying about:
1. Being convicted of pride. I think sometimes what I believe is right and good (I'm thinking of doctrine and some political issues) but I'm very snooty towards people who don't believe the same way. Sometimes I try to check that emotion at the door before I say something or act on it, and focus on listening to people before I jump to conclusions or comment on what they say, but that doesn't always work, and I know there needs to be an attitude change inside before there will be real change in my words and actions.
2. Always on a quest to figure out my anxiety issues and panic attacks and how to deal with them. I think I operate on a reactive basis rather than a proactive basis, and I think that needs to change if I'm going to make any progress. Taking medicine is out of the question though. I just don't want those side effects anymore.
3. The pro-life battle. For some reason, with government-funded abortion and the new health care laws that are being passed, this is a huge issue for me personally. Honestly, I'm often in an internal struggle between wanting to punch people in the face over it (I know, not the reaction I should have) because I feel like this issue is very black and white...innocent human beings are being killed. Why is this even a debate?, and then the realization that the reason people believe this is okay is usually rooted in the belief that sexual promiscuity/free-for-all is okay, and how that's really sad. The battle between reactive anger and sadness over people's blindness. I realize more and more that although abortion is a huge problem, it's really just a very gory symptom of a major disease of our society, and as much as I want legislation passed outlawing abortion, and as much as I know it will actually help abortion to be rare (Planned Parenthood is lying to everyone about that), I know that real change will only come with Jesus and His ability to change hearts. And I guess that's the case with any societal ill. Nevertheless, I've been thinking about how I can do more to work against this injustice, one that is so easily ignored and brushed away as if nothing is actually wrong.
4. General discipline. I need it in all areas of life. Whether it pertains to specific Bible reading, getting into a housekeeping routine, cooking, eating healthy and working out...these are things I'm constantly being convicted of and I know I need to improve. Where to start and what kind of reasonable goals to set in these areas is what I'm still trying to figure out. But I'm trying to keep a balance and not take on too much at once, you know, just being realistic about things and not being too hard on myself.
Overall, life is good. Never perfect, but good. I am richly blessed and not nearly as grateful as I should be for all that God does for us...working on that too! I look forward to heaven every day, and I know every day God is faithful to make me more like Him. It's a wild ride!
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